Some escorts like this one who been texting me go too far. You cant sell to the person who feels like he’s been riped off. Maybe she knows how to suck but thats all. Her rate was ridiculous $225 per hour thats too expensive for almost below average looking bitch. She shouldnt even be calling herself an escort…
After a few weeks when I already forgot about awful her she calls me. Of course I dont answer the phone. Then she texts me:
Hey sweetie it’s laila. How have you been? It makes me laugh cause thats just so fake and obvious what she wants, so I text her back:
Hey sweetie. What do you want? I hope you wont tell me that you are pregnant cusz its impossible. So we start texting back and forward:
Escort: No hun I’m not pregnant lol I just wanted to check on you and say hi. The last time we spoke you weren’t a happy camper so I just wanted to make sure you’re ok that’s all. (Yeah bitch I believe in you!)
Me: I believe in you so sooo much (I think it’s time to be sarcastic)
Escort: That’s good. I am glad to hear that and I am also here for you if you ever need to talk. (Ok. I feel like talking to the automated voice machine or maybe shes just fucking stupid)
Me: You sound like a broken radio. Stop being fukin high. ( I mean wtf I supposed to say?)
Escort: Excuse me? I am not high at all honey. I am just trying to be there for you as a friend but I am sorry if you cant appreciate that. (OMG i paid you so there would be no drama don’t you remember?) Continue reading…
I am not sure if you have ever known about this porn site called “Big Sausage Pizza” basically if you love pizza you gotta love pizza porn too. God, who watches that or at least is turned on by this idea? The guy delivers pizza in the pizza box and then after he gets in the living room (do people who order pizza actually let delivery guys get inside their house these days?) he sits on the couch with this big pizza box right on his lap and then when the women opens it his cock sticks right out of that box. Guess what happens next? Yeah, they fuck…
After remembering that I know this site I came up with the better idea. How about we make it live? Ok here it goes…. We go to the restaurant that has good surveillance cameras and then we deliver the pizza with the special sauce called white tomato sauce. No, its actually the real tomato sauce mixed with the cum that some guy with the monster dick have jerked off on it in the kitchen . We call it today’s special pizza. Buy one and your girlfriend gets one for free! Tell me who would refused to that offer?
The best part of it is to see the video, how the cameras captured the face expression of that bitch who just ate someones cum. She would be suprised how delicious it can be once it is with pizza. Do you think her boyfriend would be jellous? You bet! I would give away anything to see this happen, thats so hot…
Here are some definitions of the cum sandwich according to the Urban dictionary:
Two guys ejaculating semen while penetrating another person’s mouth.
Example: Ben and Dylan gave Elise a hot cum sandwich last night. It was wicked because we were all watching and shit.
When finished having sex and after leaving your load on your sex partners chest you lay down in your own mess letting it squish between both of your naked bodies. Example: Hey babe instead of spooning tonight how about we make a cum sandwich. Continue reading…
If you ever get to go to the hospital, we hope that nothing serious, make sure that you choose the hospital with the hot nurses. Most of the hospitals do have hot nurses in place… did you ever wonder why? Its part of the expensive service that you have to pay for, especially here in Chicago Illinois.
This guy seems to be in the hospital for so long that he knows his babies, we mean nurses.
Once the doctor leaves, he makes all of them to cum in his room. With five hot bitches you can expect nothing less then the wild fuck. All those nurses are so on his cock that we cant even see him. While he fucks some of them the other ones are warming up with each other. Oh those pussy licking whores! who knew that nurses can get out of control that much that they would fight who will get to deepthroat his big dick. No its not a dream, its reality. He really fucks all of them.
What do these words mean? Camera, hot girl and you? When we add them together we get the stickiest fun on the internet you ever get to experience.
Webcam girl will do whatever you ask her because thats her job to satisfy you. Trust us, you will be amazed by the variety of choices you have at almost no cost to you and the most important thing is that your privacy is 100% guaranteed.
But what if webcam girl is not a such a high turn on to you? You can choose to see teenagers having sex or how about mature couple fucking live right on your monitor? Does that sound good?
Our favorite shows are when hot bitches do sextoy shows or even when they spill the milk all over their hot bodies or fucking big titties (it depends on what you have chosen). Make sure you ask the girl about the shows that she can do for you in the free chat room. Yes, it should be something similar to the job interview…
We would advise you to start shopping for Webcam girls here. They have some sexy bios and girls to choose from. Take it slow, make sure you enjoy every step of it. You should feel just like getting a chance to fuck one of the hot girls from whore house or even better from your workplace of course if they have some good looking girls there.
So let the stickiness begin and please don’t moan too loud, your neighbor or spouse may get suspicious!
We think that is kind of hot to see strippers get fucked. Usually we only see them strip and then we have to go to the strip club’s bathroom to finish ourselfs. StripClubLove.com lets us not only to see those babes strip but also we get secretly to see them fucking in the VIP rooms.
If you always loved to see your neighbors fuck then you will definately love this site because it features hidden cameras, surveilance cameras, upskirt cameras, VIP room and eyeglass cameras.
To have an idea how everything looks like we have the video for you. So happy and wet watching!
If you’re going to deal with a Chicago Escort Agency, wouldn’t you go for the most respected one in the industry? Sure you would. Never settle for anything less than you deserve. And as a client, you should seek the services of the best agency escort in Chicago. Any other agency won’t do.
However, there are quite a good number of escort agencies operating in the city. But only a handful of them can really deliver exceptional service at all times. When seeking the help of a Chicago escort agency for your companionship needs, be sure that you put on a big weight on honest service. Continue reading…
There are a lot of reasons why men go out on a date. The most common of which is for comfort and companionship. Going through blind dates were very popular before. But the practice is almost long forgotten now. And that’s because there is always a Chicago escort willing to take your call.
If you only want companionship, you don’t really have to go through the usual hassles of wooing a girl to be your date. Why bother yourself with all the possible rejection when you can simply pick up the phone and be with a pretty Chicago escort in an instant? Continue reading…
We cant afford not to tell you about 90 Minute escort agency. They have some of the hottest London escorts. Yeah we know, unluckily those hot cupcakes are located in London. If you are willing to travel we recommend you to book one of those babes now.
Lets take a deeper look at those escorts and what they can do for us besides sucking off our pipes… The agency itself claims that they provide services with style, all we have to do is describe our dream date and they will do a free match. So whats your dream date? We not sure if you have ever heard of the small country in Europe called Lithuania, but from the personal experience here at SplashyXxX we know that this country has one of the hottest girls in the world. Just take a look at her, don’t you think that she is one of the Londons hottest escorts? She is not only good looking but at the same time she is sure to blow your brains out. Here what one of her clients have said about her
My god, the most beautiful girl I have ever had s** with! Mind blowing. All positions. Will visit again!
The other escorts have very similar reviews which means that most likely you will not be disappointed so let us know how everything went if you will ever get a chance to spent some time with one of those babes.
Its boring Thursday night and we decide to go out and have some fun. We take the camera guy with us…
We go to the gas station and wait for some hot chick to show up who would agree to earn some quick cash, instead we find this BBW who is a hot black bitch with huge titties. Her car’s tire blew up and amazingly she has no clue how to take care of that little problem, luckily we are there at the moment. Before approaching this bitch we let our camera guy to take a good look at her…
Oh shit, she has no panties under her mini skirt! She must be a fucking prostitute or something. Should we do splashy pornaza with this prostitute? Hell yeah! So we approach her happily…
Unluckily things don’t go well with her and we end up breaking up. We are not amateurs we know how porn business work that’s why we give her our business card.
3am. Guess wheres that black prostitute is?? In our room wearing only panties! You must see how we fuck the shit out of her. She swallows that cum like a big girl [wink, wink].
